What I’ve Read: The Fault in Our Stars by John Green

This book is as good as you’ve probably heard it is. It’s the story of two young teens with cancer, and while that may sound a little depressing or even a little Walk To Remember, I assure you—it’s not. The literary equivalent of Juno (+ cancer), this book is witty, funny and just begs you to turn another page. I read the entire thing in about two hours and couldn’t stop talking about it after that. Whether or not two teens would have the existential insight and impressive intellect they are given in the book doesn’t really matter because it’s so enjoyable. (There are a few moments I stopped and thought, “No teenager would talk like this,” but that small reservation is inconsequential when the book is viewed as a whole.)

It’s hard to write a book that makes a reader care about the characters and what happens to them. Ironically, like the way the fictional, cancer-ridden teens in this book care about what happens to several characters in a book they both love, I found myself wanting more as I turned the last page.

Have you read this book? What did you think?

What I’ve Read: The Obamas by Jodi Kantor

I admit that I’m struggling to write this review. I’ll nit-pick in a moment, but for now I’ll simply say that this book was like the ultimate Dessert Book. It was voyeuristic and fun—the book equivalent of picking up US Weekly or InTouch. There was mention of how Michelle Obama’s wardrobe has played into public perception, there was a section on their disastrous New York City date night, there were little political asides and well-written summaries of the President’s challenges and victories over the past several years. It’s such a far-reaching book that you assume it will be completely vapid and underdeveloped or confusing chronologically. It’s neither. Perhaps the worst you can say about it is that it’s entertaining—and to some, that might be a negative thing.

As someone who voted for Obama in 2008, I have to agree with other reviews I’ve read in that the most irritating thing about reading this book was how often Obama’s missteps are laid out. (It’s hard to read, especially when you think back to the optimism that pervaded everything at the end of 2008 and in early 2009.) The book is not overly long, and the problems that he’s encountered throughout his first term seem to come back to back to back. Among a sea of challenges (some of which were overcome, others not so much), there are occasional wins for the Obama team, but you come away with a general sense that the administration was initially overwhelmed and disorganized and that set the President’s agenda back too far to fully recover.

Another interesting thing: I became really curious to read this book after seeing the White House’s swiftly negative reaction to the publication of The Obamas and a recent Politico article seemed to align with my suspicions. Why did they condemn the book so strongly? I think it touched a nerve, especially with Michelle Obama and her public relations team. Her portrayal in the book is actually quite a positive one, but there has been a concerted effort on the part of the administration to make her seem less opinionated and more passive since the inauguration and this book moves to defeat some of that image “repair.” (Personally, I prefer an outspoken, opinionated First Lady, but I guess the majority of the country doesn’t feel the same way.) She is shown to be just as opinionated in the book—the only exception to this being that she reserves her remarks for private settings within the administration instead of speaking to reporters or to crowds about them.

Anyway, if you’re looking for something entertaining to read or you are intrigued by this President and the First Lady (who isn’t?), I recommend giving this book a go.

Have you read this book? What do you think?

What I’ve Read: Two Kisses for Maddy: A Memoir of Loss & Love by Matthew Logelin

You probably know of Matthew Logelin from his blog. He continued to blog after his wife, Liz, died shortly after giving birth to their daughter Madeline and the blog has continued to grow in the years since. Matt writes the most beautiful, heart-wrenching posts about love and loss and the pain he feels over losing Liz is always a palpable presence when browsing through his blog.

It’s no wonder his story was turned into a book. His wife’s loss was a freak tragedy, and was—as he notes—the kind of circumstance that make people turn to one another and say, “I’m glad it wasn’t us.” Where Matt’s blog posts are sometimes written in a poetry-like style, the book is straight prose with snippets of his posts inserted at the top of each chapter. This is no sugar-coated, come-to-Jesus account of loss, either. He eschews overwrought language and introspection for an honest depiction of his varying and overwhelming emotions, complete with cursing, anger and depression. There is no attempt to sugarcoat any of his experiences into a teachable moment for readers: he just tells his story.

Have you read this book or Matt’s blog?

What I’ve Read: How Eskimos Keep Their Babies Warm And Other Adventures in Parenting by Mei-Ling Hopgood*

When I first brought Isobel home, I was Googling or researching the answers to tons of questions I had. From the mundane to the POTENTIALLY LIFE-ALTERING, I was fearful that one wrong move would forever ruin my child in some way. Why was I so panicked? Other than the obvious (it’s natural and I think most women go through some anxiety at first), there has never been more scrutiny on parenthood—and mothers in particular—than there is right now. Part of the reason for this is that more women are making their decisions and their child-rearing very public. You may know more about a stranger’s views on parenting and child-rearing than the views of a best friend…or even those of a significant other. Thanks to Facebook, Twitter and blogs, there are more opportunities for parents to communicate and encourage one another, but there are just as many opportunities for judgment and peer pressure.

The culture (whether it’s overt or not) of there being a “better way” or a “worse way” when it comes to parenting decisions is exhausting to try and navigate. Disposable or cloth diapers? Breast-feeding or formula? Attachment parenting or not? Crib or bassinet or co-sleeper? The options—and the opportunities for judgment and peer pressure—are endless.

That’s why this book is so refreshing and wonderful. Hopgood, an American living in Argentina, begins to notice the cultural differences between bedtime/rest for Argentinian infants and American infants. From there, she explores several other cultures and their views on infant-rearing and everything in between. There’s very little “preachiness” happening and Hopgood doesn’t necessarily draw any conclusions that would break the majority-rules status quo of infant-rearing protocol here in the United States, but she does make a few inferences that I found interesting. First, she indirectly hints that many other countries hold their children to higher expectations than American infants or toddlers, and also suggests that several developmental milestones (potty training, for example) are delayed in the U.S. because we simply don’t expect that children are capable of potty training until a certain age. It’s an interesting point of view.

But, other than those view subtle items of note, Hopgood mostly keeps to an informative, light tone that ultimately helps to show that there is no one, perfect way to raise a child. Additionally, Hopgood doesn’t just do sideline research: she tests several of the tactics on her own daughter, meeting with equal parts success and failure. (She notes that she learns a great deal no matter the outcome each time.) I appreciated that Hopgood was willing to put her findings to the test, and she was honest when things didn’t work and when she felt that her way was better for daughter. There’s a lot of intuition and trial-and-error involved!

*Book provided for review.

Have you read this book? What did you think?

What I’ve Read: What It Is Like to Go to War by Karl Marlantes

Vietnam veteran Karl Marlantes wrote this haunting nonfiction book about the realities and after effects of combat, in the context of both historical conflict and modern-day war.

I had put this on my to-read list after reading a review of the book that earmarked it as one of the best insights into the modern-day warrior mind that the reviewer had ever read. Although I can’t say I’ve read every book in this genre in order to make that comparison myself, I can say that this book—and Marlantes’ personal combat experiences—will haunt me for some time to come.

There is a divide between a civilian (like myself) and the veteran or modern soldier that this book attempts to gap by showing how intrinsically different combat is from any other human experience. There’s a tendency among civilians to believe certain things about combat situations from movies or fiction books, and I know I’m guilty of this myself. (I wonder how many non-veterans claim their greatest exposure to the Vietnam War to be Apocalypse Now, for example?)

What this book does so well well is putting words to emotions and to experiences in a masterful way that I haven’t read before. I found myself taking away something so valuable from reading this, but believe that there is an even greater value in this book for the combat veteran, or currently-enlisted soldier, or for the person thinking about enlisting, or for the family or wife of a member of the armed forces. As for me—someone with very little personal connection to the military—I have left this book with a completely altered thought process regarding our nation’s soldiers and what is expected of them both abroad and at home. It’s incredibly sobering and eye-opening.

Have you read this book? What did you think?

What I’ve Read: The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides

This highly praised novel is the story of three college students who have some serious angst about love and life. I’m not posting a lengthy synopsis, except to say that the plot seems straight out of an indie movie (you know the type—a coming-of-age type film that doesn’t end satisfactorily).

That’s not to say that the book doesn’t end satisfactorily. It does. The best part of this book was (in my opinion) Eugendies’ masterful ending that improved immensely over the hundred or so pages that had come before. What I mean by that is that this book was compelling in fits and spurts. I found certain sections lagging, then picking up again, etc., and this made it difficult for me to read it at long stretches at a time.

I guess if I were to boil everything down—to make a recommendation to you on whether to read it or not, blah, blah—I’d say, yes, please read this. It will, based on current critical acclaim, likely be listed among the greatest of our contemporary literature and if that matters to you, you should probably give it a try. If you like Eugenides’ other books (Middlesex, for one), you’ll probably like this as well, though maybe not quite so much as Middlesex. As for me? I more or less enjoyed my time reading this, but it didn’t quite move heaven and earth the way I half-expected it to.

Have you read this book? What did you think?

What I’ve Read: Gang Leader for a Day by Sudhir Venkatesh

This nonfiction account of Venkatesh’s befriending of a Chicago gang leader and his attempts to chronicle the inner workings of gang life in the Robert Taylor Home projects is almost unbelievable. Venkatesh was given incredible access to a life far removed from his own upbringing. His mistakes are truly gut-wrenching (on more than one occasion, I worried for his safety), but become fewer and further between the more comfortable he becomes in his new surroundings.

Although the book is older, much of what Venkatesh mentions are still all too relevant truths that exist in the carbon copies of the Robert Taylor Home projects in cities all around the country. For example, it takes Venkatesh months (even years) to understand that the police and emergency medical services are not the same entities in the projects as they are to middle and upper-class neighborhoods. He regularly asked those around him, “Has anyone called an ambulance?” or, “Why haven’t you called the police?” It’s only after some time that he realizes that it’s because they either don’t come or arrive too late to help…or, even worse, they arrive but don’t help at all.

If there’s one word I’d use to describe this book, it would be to call it sad. It’s sad from start to finish. How could it not be? There is a prevailing feeling of hopelessness that chases everyone Venkatesh writes about. And, although I understand Venkatesh’s desire to have academic objectivity about his “subjects,” I wish he had used this book—a great platform—to try and urge the reader to some kind of action. I don’t know what that would be, or if that even makes sense, but I closed this book feeling unsettled. On second thought…perhaps that’s the way he wanted it.

Have you read this book? What did you think?

What I’ve Read: The Winter of Our Disconnect: How Three Totally Wired Teenagers (and a Mother Who Slept with Her iPhone) Pulled the Plug on Their Technology and Lived to Tell the Tale by Susan Maushart

I’ve always been a little addicted to technology. My family used to have to drag me away from the family computer kicking and screaming and I was always tapped to do light troubleshooting for my friends or family members. Remember Geocities, IRC and all that? I do. (Sometimes I wish I didn’t.)

The other day I tweeted about all the technological gadgets I was surrounded by, and honestly? I’m surrounded by most of them all day for hours at a time. I have a chronic addiction to my iPhone and have been known to set it in my lap while driving on the (horrible! unimaginable!) off-chance I miss a call or text because I didn’t hear it vibrating from its other resting place on the passenger seat. Now I have an iPad and it’s feeding my tech addiction in a whole new way. I can create and read content on a level that a smart phone just isn’t conducive to. I can track my contractions on an iPhone or iPad app, for godssake. It’s crazy.

But, despite all this Internet/technology addiction, I am careful to (try and) keep strict boundaries in place when I am with Brandon or with my family/friends. I frequently go from late Friday night until Sunday evening without touching a computer and have a strict no blogging rule when Brandon is home. It’s important to me only because I’ve seen first hand what technology can do when paired with a potentially destructive workaholic streak, to name one example.

This book not only presents an incredible amount of research and information about technology and the effects of technology on younger generations, but is also witty and personal and honest. Maushart’s children may not have liked having to do their homework at their friends homes, but Maushart noted that her one son went from asking for video games for his birthday to asking for about a dozen books instead…and was thrilled to receive them.

Although I can’t ever do Maushart’s experiment firsthand because of the nature of my work, I can do it in small doses and take her advice about how to integrate technology in a healthy way into my child’s life as well. This is something Brandon and I discuss often. How can you not? Do we want Isobel to have an entire existence chronicled online before she can even choose whether she wants it or not? Is it even possible to contain it? Do we want to? How can we make technology beneficial for her without giving her a crutch that comes at the expense of creativity, reading and other offline hobbies?

We still don’t know the answers, obviously, but I appreciate that this book has given me greater context from which to make decisions in the future.

Have you read this book? What do you think? What are your thoughts on all of these topics?

What I’ve Read: The Bee Eater: Michelle Rhee Takes on the Nation’s Worst School District by Richard Whitmire

I read this book for a few reasons. First, I’m insanely curious about Rhee. I actively seek out articles about her or interviews with her and followed her movement as DC schools chancellor closely. Coming from a family of educators, I find her to be a fascinating public figure. The second reason I wanted to read this book is that despite my interest in Rhee, I still didn’t feel knowledgeable enough about her—or her policies—to make a judgment call on the work she did during her term as chancellor.

Here’s the good about this book: it’s laid out well and organized in such a way as to boil down the not insignificant amounts of information about Rhee into approachable, easy to understand chapters. Whitmire did an admirable job of staying out of the weeds and focusing more specifically on the broad strokes of Rhee’s decision-making. The book also provides a non-DC resident some fairly good insight as to the major struggles in the education system—struggles that are echoed at-large in other areas of city politics. Whitmire explains the socioeconomic divides helped along by DC’s geography in a way that even a local may not fully grasp, and that’s helpful to remember throughout the book as a major context to the reforms Rhee was trying to put into place. Additionally, although I knew most of what Whitmire discussed in the book, there were absolutely some moments that took me by surprise. The multifaceted nature of Rhee’s tenure made it difficult to sort through all the information in real-time, and with the benefit of a year or two years of research, Whitmire has helped bring issues to the surface that were probably never touched on by the local media.

But…that’s the good. Unfortunately, there’s a major (bad) problem with the book. Luckily, the author himself addresses it in the forward, which is to say, that he mentions he was very close to the issue and in the process of seeking Rhee’s cooperation with the book (he got it), he also became a Big Rhee Fan. That bias is evident throughout, and although he tries to present legitimate criticisms of Rhee that led to her eventual ousting later in the book, Whitmire’s bias makes the entire chapter come off as defensive or excuse-laden rather than objective.

However, in the end, I still got what I wanted out of the book. I got an in-depth portrait of Rhee (both personal and professional) and feel more educated about the work she did as DC schools chancellor—enough to maybe discuss it without feeling like I’m grasping at straws or simply pulling random quotes from Post articles or NPR interviews. Whether you love her, hate her or know nothing about her, one can’t deny the fact that she brought attention to many issues that would have otherwise stayed buried…both in DC and on a national scale. It’s clear there were missteps during her term, but she also sparked positive education reform and got people talking about issues and looking for ways to solve problems. Whatever your personal opinion, she’s someone worth reading about.

Have you read this book? Were you a Rhee fan while she led DC schools? How did you feel about her work?

What I’ve Read: Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) by Mindy Kaling

I’m pretty sure everyone on Tumblr who wanted to has already this book, but for those of you that haven’t and are still interested, here’s my short review:

It’s funny, it’s witty and it fulfills exactly every expectation you probably have about it.

(…Well, except that I’m greedy and wished there had been more about The Office.)

Have you read this book? What did you think?